The 12 (approximately) pubs of Christmas

If you are a Facebook or Instagram follower, you may have noticed that I was recently in Tasmania (full blog soon!). I had a 12 day pre-Christmas holiday. You may have also noticed, in true Aussie fashion, that it was a holiday of pubbin'. Whether it was stopping in for a cook beverage, for a night of accommodation, or just a historical perusal, there were more than 12 pubs visited in 12 days. It's difficult to get in the Christmas mood when it's 80 degrees, sunny, and you're driving along beautiful beaches and winding alpine rain forest roads. But the Tassie publicans had something else on their minds. A little Christmas cheer seeped into the smelly carpets, dingy barrooms, and friendly local atmosphere of the Tassie pubs. Thus it's only appropriate to summarize the pub-themed Tassie holiday with a belated Christmas ode (in abridged version).

Note: This post idea came from an 8 pubs of Christmas Facebook post referred to alter in the article :)

On the twefth day of Christmas my true love sent to me...

12 glasses of Tassie pinot 

(the grapes that grow naturally in Tassie's cool climate)

11 stubbies of Carlton 

(an Aussie fave for some)

10 chats with locals 

(or karaoke, there's a first time for everything)

9 middies of James Boag

(and yes, that's a countdown to Christmas AND footy season)

8 nights in pubs 

(see here for full pub story)

7 toast & weetbix  "continental" breakfasts

(complete with instant coffee and Vegemite if you dare)

6 steps for Santa drinking XXXX

(pronounced "four-X")

5 bowls of wedges 

(with sour cream and sweet chili sauce)

4 plates of chicken parmi 

(and one seafood parmi, what a GREAT idea)

3 Christmas trees

2 Santas with a garland

And a Santa hanging down from the bar

Merry Christmas!!!

Gone Pubbin' Update

If you are a loyal reader, you may remember a certain pub tour of the Australian wheatbelt. The was over a year ago, and I have been to many a pub since then. And I've been to some good ones recently. So I figured it's time for a bit of a pub update. And in case you ever find yourself in Australia, in need of some classic country pub accommodation or just a middy on a hot day, check out PubLocation.

Green stars are pubs I've stayed at, yellow stars are one's I've stopped at, and white stars are those that I remember passing. And all the tiny beer mugs are pubs yet to be seen (or to be missed)

There are 335 pubs in Western Australia listed on pub location. Of those 335, this is the list of pubs by town that I know - you say the name of the town and I can picture it. Either I've stayed there, stopped in and had a beverage, or driven passed and vetoed as it lacked authentic pub-ness, or drove pass without enough time to stop and is on the list to return to someday. Feel free to follow the link and check them out for your nest holiday.

The pubs I've driven past (ok no telling lies, mostly ridden by in the passenger seat) and had no interest in going in:

1. BEVERLEY (2)
2. MERREDIN (3)
3. SPENCERS BROOK (1)
4. WANDERING (1)

Pubs I've gone past, know where it is, and if the opportunity arises, I'd stop in:

1. GREENHILLS (1)
2. KOJONUP (2)
3. MINGENEW (1)
4. MULLEWA (2)
5. PERENJORI (1)
6. RAVENSTHORPE (1)
7. WAGIN (2)

Pubs I've had a bowl of wedges or a cool beverage or broken the rules and ordered a coffee:

1. BALINGUP (1)
2. BROOKTON (2)
3. BRUCE ROCK (1)
4. CHIDLOW (1)
5. CORRIGIN (1)
6. CUBALLING (1)
7. GIBSON (1)
8. GRASS PATCH (1)
9. KALGOORLIE (14)
10. KULIN (1)
11. LAKE GRACE (1)
12. LAKE KING (1)
13. MOUNT HELENA (1)
14. NANNUP (1)
15. NARROGIN (3)
16. PARABURDOO (1)
17. QUAIRADING (1)
18. ROTTNEST ISLAND (1)
19. SALMON GUMS (1)
20. SOUTHERN CROSS (3)
21. TOODYAY (3)
22. WICKEPIN (1)
23. YORK (1)

Pubs I've made the ultimate inspection and stayed over night:

1. ARDATH (1)
2. COOLGARDIE (1) - times 2! And the woman with the mullet opened up just for my parents and I on Good Friday
3. DENMARK (2)
4. DUMBLEYUNG (1)
5. HOPETOUN (1) - it as my first Australian pub, and it happens to be on the beach
6. MOORA (2) - been to both pubs there
7. MOUNT BARKER (2)
8. NORSEMAN (1) - stayed here twice in the corner room
9. PEMBERTON (1)
10. PINGELLY (2) - been to to pubs in this two pub town
11. WAROONA (2)
12. YEALERING (1)

Three of these pubs I have stayed at in the past six months deserve special attention:

Dumbleyung

This town is south east of Perth in the middle of the Wheatbelt.

It is the exact image of an Australia country pub.

It's a bit pricey, but the complimentary chocolate and port in the room and the company of the local farmers (I played pool with a local 10 year old) were beyond worth it. Not too mention one of the best chicken parmigiana I've tasted and a friendly men's shed across the street.

 And if you are up for some sightseeing, you can head out to the hill in the middle of the farm to see Lake Dumbleyung, where they broke the waterspeed record in 1964.

Ardath

Ardath is a one pub town. A town that is a pub. Ardath does not qualify as a town. It's a pub next to the hay silo, east of perth and 20 kilometers south of Bruce Rock. It's owned by Alan, a retired butcher from Perth who moved out here 10 years ago and may drink more behind the bar than he serves. But he makes a mean steak, chips, and salad which he serves to all his patrons boarding house style.

Yealering

Yealering is a one pub town, but unlike Ardath, there's a few houses on the gum lined trees, a post office, and a footy oval. The pub is a classic, but the rooms have been slightly updated (at least painted) by the last owner. The best part about Yealering was the publican. A woman who told us her life story, catered to our every need, and treated us like her own cousins over for a visit.

They care about their children in Yealering (if there are any).

But they do have impressive sports facilities. The pub owner was out for the day with his lawn bowls team. The very best part was the lake. It may have been because it was the magic hour, but I could spend some more time in Yealering.

You may wonder why there is a jetty that doesn't meet the water. Apparently they used to damn a section of the lake so that people could go swimming tie up boats to the jetty. However, now the water is contaminated (but being cleaned), the dam removed, and the jetty stands in the sand.

I think wherever it leads is good enough for me and quiet, pubbin' Saturday night.

Rockin' Oz

Disclosure: I am an ignorant American who listens to music but doesn't follow it.

Over the past few weeks, I have been immersed in Australian rock culture. I have learned that there is a large discrepancy between Australian and US music charts, even for AC/DC.

AC/DC 

aka singers of You shook me all night long

Who knew AC/DC was Australian? At least some of them were, sorta, at some points. But Australia claims them as their own. And they love them. Who doesn't?

"AC/DC are an Australian hard rock band, formed in November 1973 by brothers Malcolm and Angus Young, who continued as members until Malcolm's illness and departure in 2014.^[1] Commonly referred to as a hard rock or blues rock^[2] band, they are also considered pioneers of heavy metal and are sometimes classified as such,^[3] though they have always dubbed their music as simply "rock and roll"." -Thank you Wikipedia

 

 

Review: They have a lot of energy for a bunch of old dudes. Seriously, I thought one of them was going to have a heart attack. They are loud. The 20 minutes guitar solo was unnecessary. They will always remind me of Saputo's basement.

Cold Chisel 

aka Chisel

"Cold Chisel are an Australian rock band that formed in Adelaide, Australia. It had chart success from the late 70s up until their most recent album releases since 2011, with nine albums making the Australian top ten^. Cold Chisel are regarded as having a distinctly Australian popularity and musicianship, exemplifying "pub rock" and highlighting the working class life in Australia." 

- Thank you Wikipedia

Review: Jimmy Barnes, is also pretty amazing for an old dude. I like Chisel. They give me happy Australia memories. Khe Sahn was one of the first "Australian" songs I learned when my tour guide played it on Christmas Eve at Lucky Bay down in Esperance. I have since come to know that Khe Sahn might challenge to be the national anthem of Australia, sung at pubs and bachelorette parties. Seriously, you need to know this song.

Not too mention they had tree encores. 

One of which included an awesome rendition of Georgia on my mind.

I'll take Chisel over AC/DC any day.

Putt Putt

No American beach vacation is complete without a family round of miniature golf. As the weather warms up in Perth, I'm reminded of summer evenings at Maple Breeze, Putts up Dock, and $2 mini golf at Ocean Beach at Tuesday night Cruise nights.

From volcanoes to whales to iconic windmills, and pirate themed courses in Hilton Head, the more obstacles to lose your ball in the better. Apparently there are several choices for mini golf in Perth, and if you're willing to drive, apparently Wanneroo Botanic Gardens are the best.

But if you'd like to combine your Sunday arvo with a visit to the wineries and lunch at a brewery in the Swan Valley, Oasis mini golf and Supa golf is the place to go.

Simple artificial turf and sandpits, some holes were deceivingly challenging, and more than one golfer lost a ball in the blue colored water (luckily they provide a net to retrieve your ball).

There were no whales, but there was a pig in the way.

The rules are the same on the other side of the world, though there was some compromise when combining rule interpretations from the midwest, Texas, the Netherlands, South America and Australia. Luckily we all can get along.

Pizza in Perth

Australia has excellent Asian food. Vietnamese. Thai. Chinese. Japanese.

Australia is a master of Indian curries.

Australia has delicious Indonesian food.

Australia has delectable South African, Moroccan, Nepalese, Peruvian, and decent Brazilian food.

Australia can even do a mean Italian bolognaise. 

But Australia doesn't get pizza. Proper New York pizza? Forget it. 

A buttery Chicago deep dish? Good luck.

Growing up on  plethora of local pizza joints, I realized that I've been spoiled. From Golden Pizza to Ocean Pizza, from Mystic Pizza which inspired the movie and Pizzeta Pizza which delivers by boat, and even the least favorite Nick's, I've had a lot of pizza. I even had a birthday party at Papa Gino's where we played pin the pepperoni on the pizza. I had resigned myself to Dominos as the closest to "suitable" pizza, that doesn't taste like thin cardboard that came from my freezer. It's not bad, it just doesn't taste like "pizza" to me. The crust, sauce and cheese don't meld together into one heavenly mouthful. Usually there's just not enough cheese, too many fresh toppings, and the sauce only disapoints.

After more than 2 years, I have found a suitable pizza. I was at my replacement Australian family's, who ordered pizza for Wednesday dinner. The pizza arrived and I asked where it was from: Little Caesars. Huh? The boxes were simple brown cardboard. No logos. This was clearly not the "pizza, pizza" Little Caesar's I am familiar with it.

Enter the Quatro Formagio aka four cheese. This may have been the richest pizza I have eaten. But I like cheese, and this was yum! And it was even ok with a little extra pineapple. We also had a Greek Lamb and one with Peri Peri chicken. Yes, they're a little wanky. But that doesn't mean they didn't taste good. THe real standout was the sticky fingers desert pizza. Now the only time I"ve gotten dessert pizza is off the Pizza Hut buffet when I was a kid. But this was Sticky Date pudding on a pizza and I have never tasted anything like it. A think cake lie "pudding" crust, sweet cinnamony sugary topping with white chocolate bits that melt as soon as they touch your tongue. I'm salivating thinking about it.

Now this Little Caesar's is in the Hills. For those of you who have never been to Perth, that's considered "forever" away (yes, I can see the hills from my apartment). But when you don't have a car, ts a bit of a trek just for pizza. It turns out, Theo's, a sister pizzareia, opened just across the river in Victoria Park. Pizza two weeks in a row? I'm in!

This time I picked them out. One very Australia things about this pizza joint, is that it puts pumpkin on everything. Goinig in, I even though it was festive for Halloween.

So of course we had to try the pizza with pumpkin and beetroot, then one with half chicken fettucine alfredo and half chicken with pine nuts and other deliciousness, and good old Hawaiian. They've changed the menu since then, so I clearly cannot remember their hipster names, but you get the gist.

And of course we got a Sticky Fingers. Do you not know me and my sweet tooth?!

Yes, the pizza's good. Or maybe I was just hungry. But for now, it'll do, despite it's ridiculous Perth price. But my heart will always belong to the place where a simple cheese pizza is all you need - Ledyard Center's one and only Valentino's.